I know we promised to never speak of her again, but I loved this story so much that I just needed to share it.  So The Unmentionable, lets call her Ebola, ala Lainey Gossip, has been dating some reality star douche for the last several months.  Apparently, they get into a huge fight, as seen in this video at TMZ , and broke up.  No surprises there.  The Ebola chews them up and spits them out on a monthly basis.  But the plot thickens when not even a day later Paris was seen cavorting with soccer god and uber Euro Cheese Cristiano Ronaldo, who has the potential to be hot, but is covered in oily, greasy douchiness. (Seriously, are those silver lemay shorts?  And are those legs waxed?)

Allegedly, they were at the same club and he couldn’t take his eye off her all night.  I would have thought it would be because she dances like a moron, but apparently he found something about her sexy (?!?!?).  When he finally went up to her, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other and TMZ has pictures of her showing him her lady bits (classy).  Apparently, he liked it because later that night they went back to sister Nicky’s house for further debauchery.

And with the wound of the break up still still pussing and blistering, Paris decided to rub some salt in it when her friend had this to say:

“Paris is stoked to be with a real athlete – unlike her ex, who is a low-paid minor league baseball player”

Ouch.

To which her ex’s rep retorted:

“Doug refuses to take part of this ridiculous media circus. He wishes Paris and all of her future boyfriends the best of luck.”

Am I a bad person for loving that these two are playing out their high school drama bull crap in the media for all to see?  And they have decided to involve probably the worlds second most famous soccer player?

I am excited to see where this goes next.  Will her dreaded Ebola Virus spell doom for Ronaldo’s career?  Will she get back together with her ex only to break up again months later?  Will she drop off the face of the planet never to be heard from again?  Will Ronaldo get himself a real celebrity rather than some low-class, fame whore?  Stay tuned…

Tanya: This girl really knows how to keep the spotlight on full beam. And is the epitome of class. Not sure about Ronaldo… I hear he’s a hit with the ladies but he comes across as a ‘mo to me. Is it just me?

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