(Pic: www.hollywoodgrind.com)

Star Magazine has a new article in it claiming that Britney Spears called up her ex-hubby, Jason Alexander, where she supposedly admits to him that her new BF, Jason Tarwick, beats her.

First of all, why the hell would Brit Brit be calling this dude?  Secondly, if it is t her (which her lawyers claim it’s not) why the heck is he taping her?  Besides the obvious reason of trying to profit from it?  And why would he sell the story to Star rather than try and help her out?

Anyways, her lawyers are taking swift action, claiming it is complete and total crap, that Jason has never hurt her and never would.  All good.

But People Magazine’s article on the matter makes me go “?????”.

“Jason has never been abusive to Britney,” says one close source. “Britney has in the past been very difficult and has had tantrums around Jason, but he was and is nothing but patient with her.”

“The couple’s relationship is better [than ever]. Britney and Jason lately have been very happy together.”

Lately they are happy?  She has been difficult around him?  Is it just me or is the way this these statements are being worded causing anyone else’s smut radars to go off?  I am absolutely 100% not alleging or suggesting that Jason has ever been abusive to Brit Brit, but those statements don’t exactly give me the warm tinglies.  Wat is up here?

Let’s hope nothing because no one should ever have to go through what is being alleged.  And when is this douche Jason Alexander going to drop off the face of the planet?  Dude, your 15 minutes was up years ago.  Leave Britney alone!

Tanya: I don’t think Jason T has ever been abusive to Britney, but what I think the People article is referring to is the fact that Britney can be difficult. Mainly because she throws temper tantrums when she doesn’t get McDonalds. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that she gets a little physical with him time to time (in the hitting & punching way, not the sexy times way). I’m not going to say she hits her kids, but I am going to say that she’s erratic and is not allowed to hang out with them unsupervised.

Britney Spears isn’t allowed to do anything unsupervised. If Jason T was beating on her, Papa Sears would have stepped in and said that Britney wasn’t allowed to date him anymore and she’d have to listen because the judge said so.

The “better than ever” probably refers to all the times they’ve been rumoured to be broken up, and all the times that Britney has little breakdowns which must be really hard on the relationship.

Jason Alexander must be behind on rent money because this reeks of BS. I’m not buying it.

In honour of Miley Cyrus’ 18th birthday I’d like to post a picture of Britney Spears out yesterday to get a frapp at Starbucks. This is a reminder that as one enters adulthood there are many roads you can take. Some of them end up with being unable to leave the house without your parents permission. So, choose wisely.

Stacey: Oh Brit Brit.  Isn’t it sad that she is being held up as the “This Could Be You” example…but not in a good way?  She appears to have everything, but does she?

At least she has her frapps.

(pic: JustJared)

When I saw Sean Preston’s face covered in ice cream I couldn’t help but check Britney’s to see if hers was also covered in ice cream. Surprisingly, it isn’t. But maybe she hadn’t had a chance to eat any yet.

The apple does not fall far from the tree.

(pic: JustJared)

Do my eyes deceive me?  Is that Britney Spears out in public looking half decent? 

Hmmmm, lets see.

Clean, washed face.  Minimal make-up.  Brushed and styled hair (some what). Matching outfit (some what).  A water and not a frappuccino.  And it looks like….yes!….I think she is wearing a bra!

*Uproarious applause*

See people.  Miracles do can if you really believe.

Tanya: I don’t know…. While she has cleaned herself up a fair bit, she’s still on the brink of crazy. Sure her hair looks like it might be styled, but it could also just be that her hair has matted in the back from sleeping on it and is creating a quazi ponytail. Sure she looks like the put on some makeup, but that make up might have been applied 3 days ago. But she is wearing “outside clothes” (read: not lingerie) AND she put a bra on so this is a super huge step. I’m willing to look past the shortcomings to give her props on dressing herself in a presentable fashion. Yay BritBrit!

(Pic: Us Weekly)

This picture of Britney Spears makes me a little afraid.  For her.  And for us.  Because here she is shopping, braless, her hair a mess, in 3 day old make up in a nightie.  Do you remember right after her divorce when all she wore was inappropriate clothing without undergarments and wigs and used a crazy fake English accent?  This reminds me of that.  And with word that the conservatorship that has been ruling her life might be ending soon and with no touring our recording going on, Britney is being left to her own devices.  Which is never good.

Ya.  It looks like we might be one stop away from the Brit Brit crazy train.

Tanya: In true Crazy Britney fashion she changed her outfits while shopping. You know when you go to the mall and you try something on, then put on the clothes you came in and realize that you look like crap so you fluff up your hair and maybe change into a shirt you bought? I feel bad for Britney because she must feel like that all the time. Poor BritBrit. 

Alternate title of this post: “SPF Smells What the Brit is Cooking”

(pic: The Superficial)

When Britney Spears was having her meltdown, Mel Gibson took her off to his private island for some downtime to work things out. Then when Mel Gibson was having his baby mama drama he turned to Britney Spears. I always wondered what she could offer him: someone to listen to his plight (really she just sat quietly and stared at a shiny spoon)?

But now the answer is clear: Mel Gibson wanted to consult with Britney Spears on disguises! Britney is a big fan of subtle wigs to throw the paps of her trail (and by subtle I mean neon pink), but Mel took it too the next level with a fake nose and mustache. So clever!

Stacey: Remember Charlie Sheen’s disguise?  That was the best…

(pic: Socialite Life)

(Pic: Just Jared)

Another day, another bikini for Brit Brit.  3 days, 3 different bikinis.  This bitch is on tour!  Not that I am complaining.  Sexy, glistening, bikini clad Brit is much better than this Brit.  Yikes.

Tanya: Wow. Britney really looks great here. Maybe they don’t have Frapps in Hawaii.

(Pics: Just Jared)

Here is Britney Spears, hiding that rats nest of a hair do (for once), at the beach, rocking her bangin’ bod.

Girl looks good.

Although, I don’t get her boyfriend.  Like, he isn’t really good looking and he isn’t famous and I am assuming he isn’t rich so I am not really sure whats happening here.  Plus he looks old.  Not that old is bad but for Brit Brit?  I kind of wish she was dating someone younger and hotter so when we see pics of them making out I don’t feel grossed out.

Tanya: He might not be young and hot but he keeps Britzilla under control so he’s got the thumbs-up from me. Sure seeing them making out is a little uncomfortable, but so is seeing BritBrit having meltdowns in public.

(Pic: californiarumor.com)

..You seek the guidance of another totally crazy person.

Apparently, this is exactly what is happening, if you can believe In Touch magazine.  Since the start of this whole icky mess with Mel Gibson and his latest baby mama, we have been privy to a public meltdown not seen since the likes of, well, Britney Spears.

After Brit Brit’s baby having, head shaving, umbrella swinging, hospital staying “episode”, Mel apparently reached out to Brit, flying her whole family to Costa Rica and “counselled” her through what one can assume was a combination of postpartum depression and some other kind of mental illness. 

Well, now the shoe is on the other crazy person’s foot and Britney has reached out to Mel to help him through this disaster. 

Really?  Are we sure that this person should be helping another human being cope?  This person?  Maybe she can speak from experience on a whole “been there, done that” point of view.  But that would mean it would have to be past tense.  Its more like “still there, doing that” in this case.

If we didn’t question Mel’s sanity before this point, we should now, because when Britney Spears is your voice of reason, you are in trouble.  

As much as we like to joke, in all seriousness though, I hope Mel gets the help he needs and this whole circus can stop because it is really really sad.

*Props to Cory for sending me this article*