(Pic: www.monstersandcritics.com)

Jerry Lewis has just proved that he totally crazy…or totally awesome, I can’t decide.

When interviewed by Inside Edition, he had this to say about Lindsay Lohan:

“I’d smack her in the mouth if I saw her,”….I would smack her in the mouth and be arrested for abusing a woman!”

“I would say, “You deserve this and nothing else’ … WHACK! And then, if she’s not satisfied, I’d put her over my knee and SPANK her!”

“[It's] the same thing with Paris Hilton,” … “Those children are begging for help. What they’re doing is saying, ‘I’m f-ed up, can you help me?’

Honestly, I am not sure if this is funny or brilliant.  And I know that the Lohans are going to have something to say about this, but he is just saying what we are all thinking and wishing we could do.

Old people are hilarious.

Tanya: I’m going to have to go with “crazy” on this one.

Almost.

She clipped a baby carriage with her rented Masarati and fled the scene. From RadarOnline:

“There was a woman pushing a kid in the stroller, maybe a two or three-year-old, crossing the street,” witness Brayan Jaimetold RadarOnline.com, in an exclusive interview.

“Lindsay took the red light and hit the stroller. It wasn’t super hard, but she made impact and hit them,” Jaime said.

“Lindsay pulled to the right, stopped for two seconds, and then just kept going.”

So let me get this straight: a girl who has a history of reckless driving that had her sentence cut short is still driving recklessly and now is running over pedestrians? Why am I not surprised by this? Traffic violations like this must be a violation of her probation (I am assuming a reckless driver would have conditions on driving added to their probation because it’s logical) and if they are it might send her back to jail.

Who am I kidding. If we’ve learnt one thing it’s that Lindsay is going to get away with it. You can watch a video of moments after the hit and run here.

Stacey: Well, since her licence was revoked in 2007, she really hasn’t driven in like 3 years.  You’d think that you would need to take another test of some form to prove you can still drive.  Or is driving like riding a bike?

(pic: RadarOnline)

(Pic: img.metro.co.uk)

Apparently Lindsay Lohan has been released from rehab after only 22 days.  According to reports, Lilo was mis-diagnosed and does not actually have as serious an issue with drugs as first thought and that the original Judge on her case over reacted in  giving her 90 days in rehab.  I guess she wasn’t actually a drug addict and just some annoying bitch that couldn’t control herself of her emotions or her selfishness.

So all together, out of the 90 days in jail and 90 days in rehab she was supposed to spend, she spent a total of 35 days combined.  Awesome.

And you wonder why she, an others, don’t take the law seriously.

And whats worse, is she is going to make a killing off of selling her story.

Be prepared to be sick(er) of Lindsay’s face in 3…2….

Tanya: Just because they misdiagnosed the drug part (which I’m still highly suspicious of) doesn’t mean that the illegality of what she did is wrong either. Maybe they should take her out of rehab and put her back in jail.

(Pic: www.nhlsnipers.com)

TMZ is reporting that Lindsay may be getting out of her court ordered rehab as early as this week.

I don’t even know what to say.

I don’t understand.  Isn’t 28 days, like, the minimum or something?  How long has she been in there?

I guess we can look forward to what is sure to be a total train wreck when she gets out.  Are you ready people?  It will be Lindsay Lohan 24/7 in your face.  She will be back in the spot light, getting the attention she craves…will she have actually learned anything?

Tanya: My money is on “no”.

!! This is awesome.

The same Taiwanese geniuses that brought us the CGI reenactment of Tiger Woods’ car crash, here’s a CGI reenactment of Lindsay Lohan’s jail time complete with lesbian inmate action, a dropped bar of soap, Micheal Lohan throwing a shoe at Kate Major and Lindsay kicking back at a tropical resort that is ‘rehab’.

After a lengthy 13 days without a cellphone, Lindsay Lohan is a free woman. Kinda. She was released from jail late last night and had to immediately report to a rehab clinic. Since she was allowed her prescription meds in jail, I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if she’s allowed her prescription meds in rehab which, when you’re addicted to prescription meds, complete defeats the purpose.

Stacey: This is total and complete bull crap.  13 days of a 90 day sentence?  This will teach her nothing except that consequences don’t apply to her.  Thats like getting grounded for a week and getting off after 2 days…the lesson isn’t learned!  They could have at least kept her in for 21 days.  At least long enough to break a habit.  What a joke.  We will see how she does in rehab.

TMZ was reporting this weekend that someone close to the Lindsay case said she is actually addicted to meth and will also be treated for bipolar disorder.  Her lawyer denied it, of course.  Other sources are also reporting she still doesn’t believe she needs rehab.

(pic: The Superficial)

(Pic: poponthepop.com)

You know, my mom was hard on me growing up.  Don’t get me wrong, I had an amazing childhood and am  grateful every day for the upbringing that my parents gave me.  But when I stepped out of line, my parents came down hard on my, mostly my mom, and because of that, I never found myself in any real trouble because I learned the lesson of consequence early in my life.

You don’t need to look farther than Lindsay Lohan’s mom, Dina, to understand why her child is so messed up.  She had this to say to Radar.com:

She doesn’t have cell phone privileges, that’s absurd. She doesn’t even have a pillow to sleep on,” … “I talk to her through glass. There’s a phone and we put her on speaker but I can’t even hug my daughter. She’s treated like a common criminal.”

Ummm, Dina, Lindsay IS a common criminal. Remember those laws she wasn’t able to follow?  Well, jail is the place they put people like Lindsay who can’t follow the laws laid out.  Why should she be allowed a cell phone in jail?  Why should she be allowed any special privileges at all?  Oh right, because being famous is so hard.

The point of jail is to take away your privileges so you hopefully learn a lesson and don’t commit those crimes again.  If people could just do what ever they wanted, when they wanted to without the threat of consequences, we would live in a world of complete anarchy.  Or utopia.  But that’s another conversation all together.

I think I actually hate this family.

Tanya: The Lohans blow my mind. Why would Lindsay be allowed a cell phone? Why would she be allowed to have contact with visitors? Because she’s famous and should have special treatment? Urgh.

This is an obviously made up sketch of Lindsay Lohan in jail, but wouldn’t it be great if it turned into a graphic novel? Hollywood starlet goes to jail, gets immediately accepted by the other inmates, they plan jail breaks, share stories of heartache, have fights, have some erotic love scenes and slaughter anyone who crosses their path. I’m thinking Natural Born Killers meets Arkham Asylum meets Barbarella.

If it caught on they could make it into a movie and maybe Lindsay Lohan could get some work starring in it. Nah, Scarlett Johansson would do better.

Stacey: Lol.  This picture is my new favorite thing ever.  When has Lindsay EVER looked that good?  Awesome.  Totally awesome.

(Pic: celebrities.ninemsn.com.au)

…Someone who would represent OJ Simpson won’t represent you.

Robert Shapiro, only after a few days and a few hours before Lindsay is heading to jail, dumped her as a client.  No word on why.

Lindsay, however, is said to be furious as she feels he only used her for publicity and never really intended on repping her.  Again, more “poor me” with Lindsay.  Did she ever think that maybe he quit because he couldn’t deal with her annoying parents constantly interfering, her lack of ownership over her actions, her whining, or her wanting to get out of her jail sentence?  It was rumored that he agreed to rep her only if she would do her prison stint then go to the “sober living” house that he opened.

Linds is due in court this morning to surrender to jail.  It is probable that she will only serve approximately 25 days in the clink.  Sucks for her but I know I can really go for a Lilo break right now as I feel like I am on total overload.  Plus, when she gets out, you know she is going to be all up in our faces every where we turn.  Ah, reprieve.  Hopefully she can straighten her sh*t out.

Until then, I am sure this morning will be a total media circus…stay tuned!

Tanya: I think that’d be the hardest part of being a lawyer: it’s not about whether they did it or not, it’s about whether there is room for doubt. There was doubt in OJ’s case, but there is no doubt in LiLo’s case. You can’t win that.

(Pic: The Superficial)

Remember this?  Well apparently this picture is the result of that.  Hmmmm.  I sense some photoshop at play.

Recently my hubby and I were musing about how low Lilo seems to have sunk.  And what the next step is for her.  I said porn/sex tape.  We then discussed whether or not either of us would actually watch it if it were to happen.  I think it would be slightly more entertaining than Paris Hilton’s dead fish impersonation in hers.  Ultimately, though, we both decided we would never watch it.  At least with Paris you can laugh a little and not feel bad.  With Lindsay I think it would be slightly sad and pathetic. Like those low rent strippers in Calgary when men are flicking loonies at their lady bits; you feel icky and sad for seeing what you are seeing.

Tanya: Next step = jail. Then *hopefully* a sit down with Oprah to talk about how much she learned, then nothing. For a year, just nothing. Maybe a few candid shots of her going to the grocery store or to AA or driving lessons, but no clubs, no tabloid covers, nothing where she puts herself in that situation. Then in a year, when people trust her again, she can take on some serious roles, regain some credibility and maybe even get her career back just like Robert Downey Jr did (I am seriously hoping for this and not for the sex tape).

Stacey: I would like to clarify that I don’t hope a sex tape/porn is her next step.  I hope for the same things as you, Tan.  But, sadly, I think Linds won’t be able to stay out of the spot light for that long and a sex tape/porn is in her future.  After jail, it you haven’t learned your lesson, what else is there to do?