Stacey, remember when I said Madonna has “Granny Cleavage” and you asked me to never say the words “Granny Cleavage” ever again? Well, I was looking through the I Smell Smut analytics and people are searching Google for “granny cleavage”, finding our site, and loving our posts. In fact, of all the ridiculous things people are searching for to find our site, “granny cleavage” is the #20 traffic driving keyword. That’s fairly high for something so weird and disturbing (Tori Spelling is #1; also weird and disturbing). I’m also loving the amount of traffic we get for the term “Motorboat“.

Some other personal faves:

“bathing suits to make your butt look bigger”

“cyrus’s parenting skills”

“jared leto pretentious”

“tits in Hawaii”

Heh. Analytics are fun

Stacey: LOL!  I love this story so much!  Granny Cleavage?  Who is searching for this term?  You people are sick.  You know who you are!  *gives side eye*

Here’s the Cyrus family out to support Miley Cyrus’ new movie. Man I love this family. We’ve got Trace Cyrus on one end who looks like he’s wearing a funky shirt but that’s really just his tattoos, some chick I don’t recognize (is it possible that there’s a Cyrus that isn’t all about the publicity?), the littlest pole dancer, Mama Cyrus who kinda looks like Donatella Versace, Papa Cyrus and grammy Cyrus who looks like she might beat the crap out of you if you move her Kleenex box from the back window of the Cadillac.

I can see Grammy Cyrus smoking a menthol with a ruler in her hand making little Billy work on his stage show. All she ever wanted was a girl to put in a beauty pageant, but she’ll just have to work with what God gave her. Thankfully the boy doesn’t mind growing his hair long.

(pic: Dlisted)

(Pic: Gabby Babble)

This little girl in the above picture is 9 years old.  Yes, you are reading that right, 9 years old!  9 years old and dressed in…hooker boots?  And a mini skirt?  And hooker red lipstick?  Who on earth would allow their 9 year old baby girl to dress like this?  Oh yes, that’s right, the parents of Miley Cyrus, Billy Ray and Tish.

This is Miley’s younger sister, Noah, at some Halloween party dressed like she is ready to walk the streets and turn tricks.  What the F?

My first question is if this is infact a Halloween costume, what exactly is she dressed up as?  Because to me there is no recognizable identity here except street walker extraordinare.

My second question is what good parents in their right mind would allow this little girl to leave the house dressed like this?  Miley’s parents have demonstrated poor parenting skills before like allowing their 16 year old daughter to pole dance on national television as well as allowing their son Trace to get tattoos on his face so we shouldn’t be the least bit suprised.  But this is a bit much.  Literally whoring your children out for fame?  Claiming that she “wants it”. I am sorry, but no 9 year old has the cognitive ability to actually comprehend what fame is or the possible repricusions of being a child star.  One needs to look no further than Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan to see what can become of these young stars.

So why is this being allowed?  When I was 9 years old if I would have even thought about dressing like this I would have been grounded.  Grounded for life actually.  There isn’t a universal parenting book, but some things should just be common sense like not allowing your daughter to dress like a whore.  Common sense once again being proved that it isn’t so common.

Tanya: These pics make me sad. Usually the kid stars wait until their early 20′s to go through the super-slutty phase. At this rate Noah’s going to have a meltdown and be in rehab by the time she’s 12.