After dating for about 2 years Bradley Cooper & Renee Zellweger have called it quits. These two were generally pretty drama-less so I don’t know if there’s a good story behind the break up but I kinda hope so. Like maybe Coops wanted kids but it turns out that Squinty hates children and isn’t allowed within 50 feet of them because one time she punched a kid in the face for giving her the side eye. Or it turns out that Squints is really a robot. Or Squints is also dating Sean Penn. And Coops is dating Sean Penn. Or maybe Coops slept with Renee’s mom. Or sister.

Or maybe one of them was just waiting for Joe Jonas to be back on the market? We’ll never know…

Stacey: Do you know who Coops should hook up with now?  Me.  No, just kidding.  He should hook up with Jessica Biel.  They would be hot together.

(pic: GearLive.com)

And the post we’ve all been waiting for, the most horrendous dresses of the 2010 MET Gala.

Maggie Gyllenhaal – WTH is up with those breasts? Did she look so much weight that they are just empty sacks that have no shape and she had to pick them up and fold them to get them into the cup? Creepy.

Katy Perry’s dress has LED lights in it (in case you were wondering why it seemed to be glowing).

And Tina Fey. I can’t even start.

Stacey: See, and I don’t hate the pant suit.  I wouldn’t wear it myself but I htink it suits Tina.  As for Maggie.  I love Maggie.  Didn’t love the dress.  But I am not going to make fun of her boobs.  Because those look like the boobs of a woman who has had a child.  And then didn’t give in to the preasures of Hollywood and had them “fixed”.  And thats part of the reason I love her.

As previously mentioned, I like Katy’s dress. 

Did you see Christina Hendricks though?  A rare miss.  And it was a big miss.  The color, the shape, its horrific and should be banned from the face of the planet forever.  And ever.

And Kristen Stewart?  So disappointing. 

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If I like one this about Renee Zellweger it’s that she never disappoints on the red carpet. Check out these poses. There’s the “drop your chin and look suggestively up at the camera”, the “look over your shoulder” and she’s even blended the “drop your chin” pose with the “side lean”.

Too bad none of these poses are working for her though.  She’s giving it about 267%.

Stacey: Renee is another person that makes me uncomfortable when I look at her.  But who are we to judge?  She is dating Bradley Cooper.  She must have something to her.

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(pics: JustJared)

I want to know who dresses Reese Witherspoon and I want to hire them. Here he is at the launch of a new Vera Wang store looking phenominal.

Check out the photo of her and Renee Zellweger. Next to Reese Witherspoon, Renee looks emaciated (OK, she always looks like she’s starving to death but this accentuates it) even though they’re probably the same size. Renee also kinda looks like a charictature of herself while Reese is proportioned like a normal human being. Renee just looks… weird.

Stacey: Renee always looks weird and emaciated.  I will never understand why anyone is attracted to her.  Seriously.  SHe is dating Bradley Cooper, has dated Jim Carey, was married to Kenny Chesney…she was even rumored to have dated George Clooney.  I don’t get it.  Maybe its a guy thing that we will just never understand?

And next to Reese, she just looks plain silly.

(pics: JustJared)

Renee Zellweger on the red carpet for the premiere of her new flick “My One and Only”. You know when your browsing the record store or bookstore and you walk into a deserted aisle but you can smell the fart of the person who was there before you? That is what this face reminds me of.

To be fair, I like this face on Renee better than her usual. What is it about her face that always looks so off?

Stacey: Yes!  This si what I am saying.  Her face always looks like…that.  Like she was peeled too hard or can’t quite see whats going on right in front of her face.  She is the classic Butter Face.  But she probably has a great personality out of necessity which is what probably makes her more appealing that Jennifer.  Jennifer is pretty so she is probably boring.

Last week Bradley Cooper went out on a date with Jennifer Aniston and Star Magazine said “It’s On!”.

This week Bradley Cooper went on a date with Renee Zellweger and it just doesn’t sit right. Two 40 yr old women? When he’s at the top of his game?

Maybe Jennifer Aniston was one of those “old-school crush” dates (he had a crush on Rachel or something). And he’s filming a movie with Renee, so let’s say it’s just a coworker dinner.

But that’s me being optimistic. What I really think is going on is that Bradley Cooper is getting paid. Aniston & Zellweger’s publicists want them to seem young & fresh (instead of old and washed up) so they’re arranging public dinners with a younger, but still age appropriate, up and coming actor who is on his A-Game. Did you know that The Hangover was the 3rd highest grossing movie this weekend? It’s been out for a month.

Bradley Cooper, while he’s on the up-and-up, should probably be dating a hot chick aged 27-32 who is also on the up-and-up. Maybe a model. Didn’t Leo & Bar break up? Bar just did a shoot with Aerosmith where she was busting out of her bikini top. Perfect match!

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